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JediKnightGirl
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PostSubject: Shadows of Shili   Mon Jul 18, 2011 8:57 pm

Hey girls! This is my first serious fan fiction! It's 6 months before order 66, and Ahsoka has been knighted. Captain Rex is now a Commander (he really needed a promotion! Wink ) and is Ahsoka's clone in command just as he was Anakin's. They have become close friends while fighting in the war, while Anakin and Obi-Wan tend to other important matters in the galaxy *wink wink* SO here it is! I hope you enjoy it as much I do! Very Happy

Shadows of Shili

Chapter 1
Welcoming

Ahsoka laid eyes on it. The planet Shili; her homeworld. ‘Now that’s a thought: visiting my home. Somewhere I haven’t been since I was a youngling. Yet somehow I’m the qualified one for this “separatist scan’.” “I don’t know Rex.” She sighed, “I know nothing of Shili. I don’t even know where to begin this “Separatist Alliance Scan.” “I’m sure the locals will be accommodating, especially to one of their own.” He optimistically replied. “Togrutan tribes are known for their hospitality and kind nature towards off-worlders according to Master Plo.” “See? Nothing to worry about.” He grinned. “Besides, you’re good with people. I can hardly say the same thing for myself.” “What are you talking about?” She laughed. “I’m just saying the only real social skills I have are with my blasters.” He smirked. “You’re too much Rex’ole boy!” she laughed again at his sarcasm. Exchanged smiles ended the friendly banter.

“We’re entering the planet’s atmosphere.” Rex reported. “What’s our first stop?” Ahsoka asked. “A rather largely populated village called Ariden.” He relayed. Ahsoka stared out the window. The increasingly large surface of the planet was beautiful. There were tall mountains, long rivers stretching for miles, lush jungles, and fertile deep valleys. It was unlike anything she had ever seen. “Initiate landing sequence Commander.” She ordered. They landed in a jungle; the village was nestled underneath large looming trees filled with draping vines. Ahsoka strode down the ramp of the Twilight. With the fresh breeze came a realization that hit her hard: she was at long last home. Although she was completely unaware of her birthplace, there was something about this particular village that was nagging at her. She began her trek through the streets, Rex following close behind. There were a great many hut homes, mostly made of dirt walls and foliage or thatch roofs. Many were decorated with Akul pelts and strung up Akul teeth. They were no doubt prizes hung with pride. The most notable feature was the baskets of native weapons and tools centrally located in front of every household; valuable keys to survival. Groups of Togrutas were now gathering around, curious to know who their new visitors were. They soon began to whisper amongst themselves.

“General? Shouldn’t there be a tribe leader, or someone to meet us?” Rex stated, becoming increasingly nervous. “Yes,” she noticed, “There is an obvious disapproval of our presence.” Just then, a tall, male Togruta approached the two. “Greetings off-worlders. I am Broka Tarsemno, the overseer of this tribe.” He introduced himself. “Greetings. I am Ahsoka Tano. I am here on the authority of the Galactic Republic to represent the Jedi Council.” She was interrupted when the overseer raised his hand. “I will show you to your quarters.” He turned away. “Your kindness is appreciated Broka, however, we are here merely to inspect the village for any Separatist affiliations.” She protested. He continued to walk without saying anything. ‘This ought to be easy.’ Ahsoka thought, rolling her eyes. “There is much to discuss.” He stated.


Last edited by JediKnightGirl on Mon Jan 09, 2012 7:00 pm; edited 2 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 6:25 am

This is really, really good! I can't wait to read more! Awesome job!

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 8:49 am

Wow JediKnightGrl!!!!!! It sounds great so far! I can't wait to read more!!!!!! Very Happy

Can I give one quick suggestion? Your spacing is good, but for me (and it may just be me) with so much dialogue, it's hard to read when it's bunched together. You might want to try putting a space between them, like:

"Hello!" she said.
"How are you doing?" he asked.

That kind of thing. You don't HAVE to, just a suggestion!

Amazing story! I can't wait to find out what happens!!!! Keep writing girl! Wink

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:21 am

Jedi~Chick wrote:
Wow JediKnightGrl!!!!!! It sounds great so far! I can't wait to read more!!!!!! Very Happy

Can I give one quick suggestion? Your spacing is good, but for me (and it may just be me) with so much dialogue, it's hard to read when it's bunched together. You might want to try putting a space between them, like:

"Hello!" she said.
"How are you doing?" he asked.

That kind of thing. You don't HAVE to, just a suggestion!

Amazing story! I can't wait to find out what happens!!!! Keep writing girl! Wink

Thanks Fallon. Yes, I had given some thought to the spacing, and I'll be perfectly honest, I hate writing it like that. But I understand, it would make it easier to read. *Sigh*
Thank you for the comment though, I appreciate it! Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 10:03 am

EEEEEEEEEE I LOVE IT!!! Please please please keep on writing!! You captured Rex so well!!
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 10:26 am

Awww, thank you so much! That means a lot! I'll have chapter 2 up later today! Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 10:27 am

YAY!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 2:56 pm

JediKnightGrl wrote:
Jedi~Chick wrote:
Wow JediKnightGrl!!!!!! It sounds great so far! I can't wait to read more!!!!!! Very Happy

Can I give one quick suggestion? Your spacing is good, but for me (and it may just be me) with so much dialogue, it's hard to read when it's bunched together. You might want to try putting a space between them, like:

"Hello!" she said.
"How are you doing?" he asked.

That kind of thing. You don't HAVE to, just a suggestion!

Amazing story! I can't wait to find out what happens!!!! Keep writing girl! Wink

Thanks Fallon. Yes, I had given some thought to the spacing, and I'll be perfectly honest, I hate writing it like that. But I understand, it would make it easier to read. *Sigh*
Thank you for the comment though, I appreciate it! Very Happy

*sighs* I absolutely hate writing like that too. XDD I usually never do. What I do (actually, what I've learned to do) is to go back later and edit it to make it better spaced. XD I've had to do that A LOT with my Reaching for the Stars story. It takes me FOREVER (only because that story is a real novel) xD

I love your story though! I can't wait to see where you take it!!!!!! Very Happy cheers

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:03 pm

Alright! I got the 2nd chapter finished. Sorry it took till tonight, I have to retype everything because I write my fan fics in my notebooks. Rolling Eyes Ahsoka is about to get the surprise of a lifetime! I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at the turn this story takes.
soka Wink As always, let me know what you think! Very Happy soka

Chapter 2

Reunions

Broka led them to the farthest hut from the rest.
“First, there is someone you need to speak to.” He stated, and then began to walk away.
A cold shiver went down Ahsoka’s spine. She faced the door, ready to knock.
“Are you sure about all of this General? This all seems very suspicious.” Rex questioned.
“Is that worry I hear Commander? That’s such a rare thing to hear from you.” She teased, “Besides, if this is as important as Broka indicated, I should investigate. Wait out here.”
“Will do.” He replied.
“We will resume discussions in the morning, Master Jedi.” Broka called from a distance behind. Ahsoka’s eyes widened and she turned to protest, but the chief was already out of earshot.
“Might as well see what I am needed here for.” She sighed as she knocked on the door. After a bit of silence, she cracked open the door a little at a time.
“Come on in dear!” called a voice from behind it. “Hello?” Ahsoka cautiously responded. “Yes, yes come in dear!” the friendly voice invited again.
The voice belonged to a Togruta woman tidying up belongings off of the floor of her hut.
“It’s not everyday we have off-worlders, please pardon the mess.” She continued apologetically.
Ahsoka felt compelled to help the busy woman, whose face she had yet to see. She got down on her knees and began handing some dishes to her.
“Oh thank you, I’ve not had guests in years.” She thanked her. “It’s not a problem ma’am.” Ahsoka assured her.
“I appreciate your help dear,” the woman stood up, “But it’s not necessar-“
The sound of shattered pottery filled the small room. She merely stood there as amazement filled her eyes.
“Oh! Are you alright?” Ahsoka exclaimed, rushing to pick up the pieces of the now broken plates. However, the woman grabbed her hands before she could continue.
Their eyes met.
“My universe…is it you?” she stuttered. Ahsoka raised an eyebrow in a puzzled look.
“Ahsoka?” she uttered her name. Ahsoka stepped back and placed her hands on her lightsaber. “How do you know my name?!” she demanded.
The woman just continued to stand there, tears now swelling in her eyes. It seemed an eternity of silence passed before Ahsoka was then jolted with an emotion of realization. Trusting her feelings, it was soon revealed to her. The woman standing before her was indeed her Mother. Ahsoka was overcome with emotion she had never experience before.
“Momma?” she could barely speak. It was all so clear now, the facial markings, her voice, and the familiar feeling about the village. She was at long last home.
“You are home! My baby has returned!” her mother ran to hug her. Ahsoka slung her arms around her.
“I can’t believe it.” She whispered. “I knew you would return home someday.” Her mother cried, slowly pulling away from the hug.
“Oh how are you darling? How has the galaxy treated you these long years?”
“Well,” Ahsoka wiped a tear from her eye, gathering her composure, “I’m a Jedi Knight. I fight for the Republic in the Clone War.”
“Oh how wonderful! You have finished your training?”
“Yes, for many years, I was the Padawan of Anakin Skywalker.” She proudly announced.
“My Soka, a Jedi Knight. And once the padawan of the Chosen One no less.” Her mother reviewed in awe. Ahsoka opened her mouth to ask how she even knew there was a Chosen One.
“Just because we are native, doesn’t mean we don’t know the goings-on of the universe my dear.” She corrected her daughter’s exasperation, “I am so proud of you.” She simply smiled afterward.
“It’s been very tough, but I’m still here.” Ahsoka reflected on her thoughts. The door suddenly opened.
“Vea’lah! Where is this guest I keep hearing we have in our midst? I wish to give them a proper welcome!” said a Togruta man placing his hunting gear down, unaware of who his guest truly was.
Ahsoka could only assume this man was the woman’s husband. Just then, she shook her head in realization. ‘If this is my mother, then that means-!’ she thought with excitement.
“By the stars!” the man shouted, now gazing upon the girl standing before him. Ahsoka rose to her feet, a joyful smile stretching across her face.
“Vea, our daughter has returned home at long last!”
The three shared a strong hug, one that seemed to last long enough to make up for the times past.
“Marel, our Ahsoka is a Jedi Knight. Isn’t it wonderful?” Vea’lah proudly informed her husband.
“And a beautiful warrior she is.” He smiled.
The three gathered around a small wooden table, letting the mood settle. Ahsoka’s mind was filled with so many questions, ones she thought she would never have answered. But of all of them, one was prominent above them all.
“Mom, Dad. There is something I must know. After a lifetime of separation, I have to know…why? What happened to me when I was little?”
Her parents exchanged looks. “I think she is ready to know.” Vea’lah sighed.
Ahsoka became tense, trying to prepare herself.
“When you were born, we were forced to give you up.” Marel explained, with a pain in his voice only a father could bare. Ahsoka’s eyes only widened.
“Your aunt, Arke’a, is the Queen of Shili. She threatened that if there was any other heirs to the throne dominate to her, she would have them slaughtered.” He continued.
“When you were born, we went into hiding to protect you. Your father did everything he could to get out from under her threats. We couldn’t leave the planet, and we couldn’t stay.” Vea’lah confessed, holding back tears.
“There was a Jedi who came to Shili one day, Koon something.” “Master Plo!” Ahsoka jumped, concluding her father’s confusion. Marel nodded his head.
“He took you away. We were heartbroken, but we did it to keep you safe.” Her mother concluded.
Ahsoka sat back, trying to take it all in. It all made sense, expect for one thing.
“But it makes no difference, you have returned now.” her father chimed in, “Now you can stand up to your tyrannical aunt and finally take your rightful place.”
Vea’lah became stiff, wondering if her husband had said too much.
Ahsoka stood up, becoming slightly scared. “I..I don’t understand. Take my rightful place?”
“You are the princess of Shili.”
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:18 pm

*Mouth falls open* Wow... that was unexpected... but good! I really like it!
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:30 pm

I know right? Thank you very much! That means a lot! :3
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Tue Jul 19, 2011 10:01 pm

Totally epic! OK... wow this is crazy. A few weeks ago my BFF and I were brainstorming ways for Ahsoka to live, and this was one of them. You are doing amazing and a LOT better then we would have done!
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:24 am

EEEEEEEPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Very Happy I CAN'T WAIT FOR MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That WAS unexpected! But I loved it!!!! You did a great job JKG! Very Happy I loved that she got to meet her mom and dad again. Wink
Boy, poor Rex must be CONFUSED. xDDD

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:39 pm

Thank you so much Shaak! My mom and I theroize about Ahsoka like that too XD

Awww thank you Fallon! That means soooo much to me! I know right? Poor Rex lol! I'm having a blast writing his reaction! XD
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Wed Jul 20, 2011 11:13 pm

I'm in love with this story!!!!! I can't wait to see what happens next!

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Thu Jul 21, 2011 10:35 am

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *checks for pulse* Yeah Im alive!! That was so unexpected I cant wait to see what happens!!
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Thu Jul 21, 2011 4:30 pm

*jaw hits the floor* This is beautiful!!! I TOTALLY love this!!! Wow. I almost don't know what to type, it's so good. *gathers thought* Ok, very, no, extremely cool story, and please, please continue!!! Very Happy It's fantastic!! Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Thu Jul 21, 2011 8:36 pm

Thank you so much girls! You are gonna make me cry! I'm so overwhelmingly excited and honored that yall love it so much! Very Happy

I may have chapter 3 up by this weekend, so keep an eye out! Wink
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Thu Jul 21, 2011 8:56 pm

I will for sure!! Very Happy Keep up the great work, Tara!! Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:42 am

Finally! Chapter 3 is complete! Thank you all for waiting and for all your awesome comments! So after a surprise of a lifetime, how will Ahsoka take it, and what will her decision be? I hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 3

Decisions

“What?!?” Ahsoka screamed. Her screams did not go unnoticed by the entire village, particularly Rex.
“Oh no.” he thought as he ran towards the sound.
Busting down the door, twin blasters drawn, he witnessed an unconscious Ahsoka fallen on the floor.
“What happened?!” he demanded as he knelt to her aid.
“Get away from her!” Marel threatened.
“Tell me what happened!” he angrily repeated.
Marel began to lung at Rex. “Mar! She must know him, lay off!” Vea’lah restrained her husband.
“She fainted; she’s fine.” She clarified, angry she was the only one exhibiting civilized behavior.
“It’s a lot to find your family and discover you’re a princess, all in one day.” Her father snarled matter-of-factly.
“I’m taking her back to the ship.” Rex ignored.
“Don’t touch her.” Marel once again threatened, this time with a spear readied in his hand.
“Listen,” Rex rose to his feet,” I don’t know who you are, or what is going on; but I am not leaving her here, the very place that caused this to happen.”
The two men stared each other down.
“Please take her before my husband does something he’ll regret.” Vea’lah accepted, still clasping his arm as if holding back a wild dog, ready to pounce.
“Thank you ma’am.” Rex nodded.
He gently lifted Ahsoka and carried her out of the once peaceful hut of the Tanos. He didn’t really know what was going on, but he had a strange and unsettling feeling that whatever it was, something had changed, forever.

Ahsoka awoke on the medical bed of the Twilight. Still not entirely aware of her surroundings, she hesitantly sat up. She held her waist, feeling sick to her stomach. Sitting directly across the room was a patiently waiting Rex cleaning his weapon. He soon noticed a now awake Ahsoka sitting upright. He rose to his feet.
“Are you alright? You had quite a fall.” He asked as she walked past him.
She was feeling the small bruise on her forehead, flinching in pain.
“Yeah…” she sighed, “I just need some air.”
She solemnly walked towards the ship’s ramp, wanting to make an escape.
“Are you sure you want to go out there alone?” Rex questioned, concerned her recent experience may have left her dazed.
“I’ll be fine.” She tried not to snap, working up a faint smile instead.
Her heart sank after seeing the smile was truly fake. She didn’t know if she was indeed fine. All she knew was that everything she had once thought she’d known was now wrong. She approached a nearby, vine-covered tree and force jumped onto a high limb. She collapsed with a heavy heart on the thick-limbed tree, high above the beautiful view below. Ahsoka stared into the setting sun; a single tear shone on her cheek. The pain becoming too much, she buried her face in her hands.
“I’m a Jedi, not a princess.” She softly sobbed. Her heart was torn in two. Should she remain a Jedi, her life long dream that had once seemed afar; to continue defending the galaxy and fighting for good? Should she, instead, stay to become princess, and rule her homeworld; leading its people in peace. Would she do it for herself, or out of guilt? What would her parent’s think if she refused?
“What should I do?” she forced out as she gazed at the colorful sky.

Ahsoka’s thoughts were broken as she heard loud yelling in the distance. She wiped the tears from her face and analyzed the land below. It then became clear as the source of the disturbance came into view; It was a group of hunters about to be overcome by a raging akul. Ahsoka knew if she was going to help them, she’d have to get there fast. It would take too long to run there. Thinking fast, she gripped an over hanging vine and pulled the elastic-like vegetation tight. It quickly built up thrust and was stretched almost to the point of breaking. Ahsoka ignited her shoto to cut the vine, quickly sending her soaring from the tree. The force pulsed through her as she flipped and landed in a split, dead center infront of the beast. A silence fell for a moment when all she could hear was her own pulsing heartbeat as she remained motionless. Then, reaching out with the force, she opened her eyes, and drove her ignited lightsabers into the beast’s neck. It all happened so fast. It reminded her of stories she would hear Jedi Masters reminiscing about during her long days as a Padawan in the Jedi Temple. They would say everything would come alive around them, the force was all around, yet all they could feel was themselves at complete peace. Ahsoka closed her eyes and sighed in her new found relief. The beast lie dead at her feet, the air still full of excitement. The three hunters only stood in disbelief at what had just transpired. Not but seconds ago were they doomed until a lone Jedi bravely flew to their rescue.
“Thank you, Master Jedi.” One of them finally spoke.
Ahsoka rose an eyebrow, surprised such a native hunter spoke basic. But then again, so did her parents. She accepted their gratitude with a nod and a smile. In truth, she was in disbelief in how she suddenly felt: Responsible. She was beginning to realize what good she could accomplish. If she looked beyond herself, she might be able to fulfill a greater purpose. After a moment, she shook off the fear she felt of her new-found thoughts, replacing it with a growing confidence. She bowed and left the hunters to their new prize of a kill.

Ahsoka made the short distance’s walk back to her parents hut. She hoped to receive some more information on her aunt. It was dark by the time she arrived. The house was filled with darkness apart from a single candle lit in one of the windows next to the porch. She peered into the window to see her mother on the couch staring back at her warmly.
“Come in Soka my dear.” She invited.
Although she had only known her a day, Ahsoka was already pleasantly accustomed to her mother’s open kindness.
“What brings you here tonight?” she asked. Ahsoka sat down next to her.
“Tell me about my aunt.” She got straight to the point, trying hard not to hesitate.
After the following moments of silence, while starring into her mother’s deep green eyes, she became afraid she had touched on a sensitive subject.
“There isn’t much to say.” Vea’lah turned away from her daughter’s gaze.
“Your aunt, my sister Ark’ea, took the crown as Queen. You see, your grandmother was the true Queen, and a fine one at that. But many years ago, when I was but a young girl, Mother became ill. My sister and I were devastated when the illness became the death of her. Our aunt became Queen until we were old enough to take the crown. The conflict arose when it was time to do so. You see, we are twins. I tried to convince your aunt time after time that I had no interest in being Queen. But it made no difference; she became consumed with jealousy, convinced I was going to take what she said was rightfully hers. She murdered our aunt and named herself Queen. Now she rules the people of Shili with cruelty and angst.” She finished, holding back tears.
Ahsoka placed a comforting hand on her mothers shoulder. She took a deep breath, trying to take it all in.
“So she has no children of her own. No threat in you, as long as she keeps you silent.” She concluded.
“Making you her only successor.” Vea’lah confirmed.
Ahsoka nodded and rose to her feet.
“No matter your decision, this will always be your home, it always has been. And you will always be welcome.” Her mother called out to her as she was heading towards the door.
“This is my home, you’re right. It needs my help. If my aunt has enslaved it, I’m going to set it free.” Ahsoka stated, more determined now than ever.
“It won’t be easy, if at all possible. She’s surrounded herself in a web of evil.” She warned her.
“I’m going to change all that.” Was the final word as the door shut and Ahsoka headed into the warm night air.


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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:46 am

EPICNESS!!!! I love the way you write so much detail!! Rex is so sweet!!
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:50 am

Oh my goodness it's so good!!!!! I can't wait to see what happens! This story is put together so nicely. Post more soon!

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Mon Aug 08, 2011 8:49 am

OHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TARA THAT IS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have such a talent for writing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Very Happy I love it!!!!!!! I can't wait to see/read what happens next!

Rex is such a sweetie. Wink I hope he stays with Ahsoka. Wink And I can't wait to find out what she's going to do! Keep writing, keep writing, KEEP WRITING!!!!!! Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Mon Aug 08, 2011 11:35 am

That was an awesome chapter! You wrote it perfectly! Very Happy Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Shadows of Shili   Mon Aug 08, 2011 2:47 pm

Thank you all so much! I love hearing what you thought of it! I'm thrilled yall loved it so much! I can't wait to write more! Very Happy
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