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 Betrayal- Order 66

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Starwarsartist
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PostSubject: Betrayal- Order 66   Thu Sep 01, 2011 8:12 pm

Soo, I decided to try my hand at writing a poem about a possible Order 66 outcome for Ahsoka. Basically, she and Anakin/Vader meet at the Temple when he's killing the Younglings, and she goes to protect them. I DO NOT want this to happen in the Clone Wars!

I suck at poetry, but I gave it my best shot!



Betrayal

Screams of terror fill the air as the dark figure walks.

He is walking death, black as night and uncaring as a rock.

The Youngling's pleas for mercy fall on deaf ears,

As the blade sweeps away any tears.

The shadow is emotionless, the darkness is his stance,

Until a smaller figure steps up to halt his deadly dance.

He recognizes the green blades and warns her then to flee,

The Padawan refuses, she says she'll stop his killing spree.

With sad resolve, the Master raises his blade,

Her expression mirrors his as her blue eyes seem to fade.

The apprentice then leaps forward, pressing the attack,

But the shadow blocks her easily, quickly forcing her back.

The remaining young watch silently, willing the shadow to fall,

But with a flick of his blade, he sends her flying into the wall.

The Padawan looks up weakly, knowing that she's failed,

But hurting more is her Master's betrayal.

She knows that she'll die by his hand,

But is surprised when he pauses, his expression as hard as sand.

As he brings his blade down, his eyes taking a yellow hue,

She thinks, My Master isn't gone, Sith.

Someday, he'll kill you.



Once again, I suck at poetry. Writing stories is my strength.

What do you think?
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JediKnightGirl
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Thu Sep 01, 2011 9:23 pm

That was fantastic! I loved it! It all flows together nicely! Great job girl! Wink
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:38 pm

Wow that was great!!! I love the last two lines especially!!!

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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:53 pm

Thank you, girls! *hugs* Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 02, 2011 7:10 am

*sobs* That was beautiful SWA!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love it!!!!!! And I am a poet, so consider yourself having done a very good job!!!!! Very Happy Excellent work. Wink

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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 02, 2011 9:10 am

Eeee I loved it! Gave me goosebumps!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 02, 2011 1:48 pm

Thank you!! Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

JC, you're a poet? Do you write Star Wars poems?
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 02, 2011 2:16 pm

That was awesome!!!!

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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 02, 2011 3:14 pm

SWA: Yes, I am a poet of some sorts....XD I've studied it in school (homeschool) and I've always enjoyed writing poetry. Smile I'm yet to write a Star Wars poem......I should try, it sounds like FUN! Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sun Sep 04, 2011 10:27 am

SUCK AT WRITING POETRY???YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!!!! XD XD I loved it!!!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sun Sep 04, 2011 11:12 am

LOL thanks! Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sun Sep 04, 2011 11:27 am

You're welcome!!
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 09, 2011 2:05 pm

THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Fri Sep 09, 2011 6:26 pm

Thank you!
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sat Oct 22, 2011 7:37 pm

wow that gave me goosebumps you definitly do not suck at poetry that was increible great job girl
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sat Oct 22, 2011 7:40 pm

Thanks! Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sun Jan 29, 2012 10:39 pm

That was beautiful SWA!! You're very good at poetry!! I wanted to cry at the end though!!
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PostSubject: Re: Betrayal- Order 66   Sun Jan 29, 2012 11:53 pm

He recognizes the green blades and warns her then to flee,

The Padawan refuses, she says she'll stop his killing spree.

-

As he brings his blade down, his eyes taking a yellow hue,

She thinks, My Master isn't gone, Sith.

Someday, he'll kill you.


EPIC!
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