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 Alternate End to Friends and Enemies

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SnipsSkywalker
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PostSubject: Alternate End to Friends and Enemies    Sat Jan 28, 2012 4:16 pm

Part of an alternate ending to Friends and Enemies that I wrote. I didn't really finish it, and the first part stinks because it's a battle scene, so I just put in the very-very-sad middle part. Basically, Bane decided they had time to stay and fight Ahsoka. And it didn't go well for her...

The next second, The Duros Bounty Hunter plunged his blade into her chest.
Her face was the very image of shock. As Bane withdrew his gantlet from her, she gasped in pain, struggling to breathe.
“M-m-master… I-I’m- sorry…I couldn’t… “
Her eyes rolled back, and her body crumpled to the ground next to him.
Anakin’s eyes flashed open, as if the death of his padawan had awakened him.
“Ahsoka!” He heard himself screaming. Trying to scream. “Ahsoka… Ahsoka!”
First Obi-Wan, now her. His padawan… his own Snips. It was too much for him to take.
He struggled to support himself. He was going to get up. He was going to make them pay. Make all of them pay.
Supporting his weight on his hands, he breathed heavily, desperately. Sweat pouring down his forehead, he summoned every ounce of strength that he had left, and willed himself to get up.
But he didn’t have it in him.
He fell back to the floor, hard. His head was spinning. He couldn’t see.
He heard Bane laugh cruelly, and the sound of a blaster clicking. Aimed at his chest. He didn’t care. He had no reason to anymore.
Then it hit him, full force. The pain was intolerable. But it was nothing compared to the pain inside of him.
He felt his life slipping away, but forced himself to stay in the cruel galaxy for a moment longer. One excruciating moment. And in that one brutal moment that caused him unimaginable pain to endure, his short life flashed before his eyes. All the happiness, the pain, the joy, the hurt, the love.
His blurred gaze moved from his lifeless padawan, not towards his killer, but directly behind him, to the man who had caused his heart to break. The man who had killed his soul.
Each breath he took wracked his chest.
“I hate you.” He spat at Obi-Wan Kenobi, his face nothing but pure, raw pain. A single tear slid down his cheek, mingling with the blood.
“I hate you.”
His head fell to the floor. His eyes closed for the last time, and he breathed his last gripping the lifeless hand of his dead apprentice.
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Starwarsartist
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PostSubject: Re: Alternate End to Friends and Enemies    Sat Jan 28, 2012 4:21 pm

Love it!!!!!!!!!!! The creepy thing is that I can actually picture this happening... It really could have happened.

great job!
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Pinksaber13

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PostSubject: Re: Alternate End to Friends and Enemies    Sat Jan 28, 2012 5:22 pm

OMG!!!!!! That was beautiful! So real... I could feel their pain. And to think Obi has to 'live' with the fact the Chosen one and an innocent girl are dead. Because of him. And to think that Anakin hated him at the last moment... And Ahsoka had to die with the 'fact' she had 'failed' her master... Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad
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Ahsoka Tano

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PostSubject: Re: Alternate End to Friends and Enemies    Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:08 pm

I CAN SEE IT! BEATIFUL! And SO SAD!
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jedigirl1990
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PostSubject: Re: Alternate End to Friends and Enemies    Thu Feb 23, 2012 8:55 pm

aww soo sad but beautifully written
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